Relationship Guidelines
First of all, a man does not call a relationship -- he refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were doin' it on a semi-regular basis". When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled "All Men Are Idiots".

New Sex Pill
A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex.

The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her it is still experimental and tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner. So, that night at dinner, she does.

All My Life
it was not so long ago
when i thought i'd never meet someone like you
wrong was i, thinking i'm in control
believing i'd never fall

About Birds

When you see a redbird start saying your ABCs. The letter you are saying when the bird flies is the first letter of your lover's name. You will marry that person, unless the bird lands on a fence.

Male/Female Dictionary
Wants And Needs (wontz and nedz) n.
Female: The delicate balance of emotional, physical and psychological longing one seeks to have fulfilled in a relationship.
Male: Food, sex and beer.

Thingy (thing-ee) n.
Female: Any part under a car's hood.
Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

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