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15) How about a little Puck?

14) Of course, ‘Romeo and Gertrude’ is just a working title. I might be persuaded to change it for you, M’Lady. 

13) Et tu, Cutie? 

12) Shall I compare thee to a brick outhouse? 

11) If I whispered in thine ear that thou hadst a body of beauty unknown but to the heavens, wouldst thou hold it against me?

10) Wouldst thou care to join me in forming the beast with two backs? 

9) My heart, it pines, as my trousers tent. 

8) Without thine companionship, dear lady, I fearest I’d spend the evening with pen in hand, if thou knows what I mean. 

7) Hey, Baby, can Ophelia up? 

6) Is this a dagger I see before me? Nay! I’m merely happy to cast eyes upon thy beauty! 

5) Greetings to you, fair sailor. 

4) But soft, what light through yonder trousers breaks? 

3) Wouldst thou away to yon Motel 6 with me? 

2) O! Prithee sitteth upon my visage, and perchance to let me divine thy weight. 

and the Number 1 Pick-Up Line Used by William Shakespeare…

1) Do me, or not do me. THAT is the question.

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