The "Nice Guy" Test

Welcome to The Nice Guy Test.

This test is meant to measure any person's "Nice Guy" level.

Disclaimer: This quiz is meant just for fun and to some, may be offensive. Romance 101 or it's creator is not responsible for any upset feelings you may have after taking this test...so have fun!

How do you typically look when you arrive to pick up your date?

I wear my church clothes

I like to dress up. Sometimes I bring a small present or flowers

I dress casually unless I am very impressed with the woman

I'm late, dress as I want, and if I bring anything it's a sixpack of beer

I take a knife

"Women are special." Is this statement true?

Yes, but they scare me

Most always

Sometimes

One or two, but only temporarily until I have my way with them. And I will have my way with them

Only when tied and gagged

Generally, when a girl cancels out of a date...

NOT APPLICABLE. I don't get the date in the first place

I get a weak excuse if I get one at all

She says she is sorry and would like to make it another time

She cries and begs for forgiveness. The only excuse I'll accept is death-Hers

She moves, changes her name, and gets plastic surgery

When I meet a girl, I...

talk about mother

want to get to know her, find out who she is, and what she does

want to get to know her, but only if she is worth it

I see a conquest in the making

usually scare them off

I think women are...

like dear old mother

should be put on a pedestal

fantastic mostly

good for only one thing

the scourge of the earth

A girl cancels a date, gives a feeble excuse, and in the process, blows your weekend.

you cry

you assume she told the truth and wanted to go with you

you are disappointed but might try again

it never occurs. If it did, there are others waiting in the aisles

You set dynamite to her house/apartment

On Valentine's Day...

I get a card from Mom

I send cards, but recieve few

I get some cards and send a few

I get a lot of cards and read only the ones I want. I send no cards unless it scores points I can collect on later

I don't get any cards and I blame all women for it

I get dates...

Through mother

through a great deal of effort, including groveling and expensive offerings

easily some times and hard other times. My success runs hot and cold

without effort. Many times they ask me

if I pay for them to go. Sometimes that just isn't enough

When I am at a bar...

I don't go to bars

I rarely get anywhere with women

I occasionally get a phone number

I score frequently

I drink until I pass out. Of course, this is only if they let me in

A girl I date for a long time quits seeing me because...

I am boring

I don't know why, many times it is for someone else

we fight too much

I told her to get lost, or she caught me fooling around

I threatened her life

When I settle down...

I want someone to help me tie my shoes and dress me

I want to get married and live like Ozzie and Harriet with lots of kids

I might want to get married. Kids are a maybe

I'll settle down when I am dead and buried

I can't settle down. The world is after me

Marriage...

is for grownups

is a pleasant way to spend a life

might be nice

is a mistake unless she is rich and beautiful and doesn't mind when I fool around

is impossible

If I ever got married I would...

have to have Mother's approval

be forever faithful

be faithful, maybe

be faithful at least the first week, or until the first opportunity to score, which ever comes first

lock her in a closet to keep her away from other men

I get laid...

What does "get laid" mean?

at least once every two years, sometimes

a few times a year

I'm not sure how many times, but it's somewhere between 365 times a year and whatever my hero Wilt Chamberlain says is his yearly average

never. But I get screwed a lot

Look at your charge card bills. Those related to women are...

mostly things I get for my mom

for dinners, flowers, presents, plays, etc.

for sports events, dinner, concerts, occasionally flowers

I never pay. If I do it is to buy beer or tickes to professional wrestling or a tractor pull. Look on my date's credit card bill to see the places I take her.

for semi-automatic weapons