By: Bellaisa Filippis
Relationships can be hard enough without your mother or friends struggling to ‘make your relationship stronger’ or, worse, trying to do away with your relationship! It's not fun to have someone meddling in your relationship steadily.
I personally experienced a friend who would consistently counsel me about my brand new relationship (now my husband). She would explain to me what he really likes and how he really believed and she would tell me that getting to involved with him may not be a good idea.
Oh, I know what you might be thinking...’Well, she had your best interest at heart!’, but you are dead wrong!
I regularly questioned as though her nosiness was part of something bigger. And it turns out, as I down the line found out, she was interested in my boyfriend and wanted to get him away from me.
We are not friends anymore but I'm married to him.
It will not always be someone trying to break your relationship up though. There are going to be people who seriously think that they are helping your relationship. This is when you need to put a stop to it and tell them a few important things that they need to fully grasp.
Keep in mind, if you are in an abusive relationship or a really miserable relationship than your friend, loved one or whoever is probably making an attempt to help you see the light; or if you are heading for heartache in some way than you may want to listen to what they are trying to say.
On the other hand, if they are just meddling because they are nosy and opinionated then you should want them to stop meddling and leave you alone.
Here are 3 things to say to that meddling person.
1. YOU Are Not in This Relationship!
A sexual relationship has much more to it than what’s on the surface where others can see. Most of us reserve a special side of our lives for our intimate relationship that only our partner and ourselves experience.
There are personal moments of interactions and intimacy that creates a tight bond between two people that is critical for a strong.
The person who is prying does not share those moments you have had. And most importantly, they are not sharing the emotions and experiences you are experiencing in the relationship.
They are in no position to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do in your relationship given that they don’t actually know what your relationship as it really is at the core!
2. YOU Are Not Me!
Frequently a meddling individual will declare "If it was up to me, I would do it differently Of course, they most likely WOULD do it that way; because that’s the way THEY would do it! But they are not you. And YOU have a unique way of doing things.
Not only do you have a different way of going about things, but you also have a unique way of viewing things and you have unique beliefs, behaviors, and dreams in life and in your relationship than they would. Because of this you handle things differently than them – and they have to realize that.
3. I am Happy With My Relationship
Occasionally you you can't convince them of anything and you just have to shine the happy aspects of your relationship.
As much as you would like to share the sadder moments or discuss relationship problems with them, they may not be able to handle hearing that kind of information without meddling in your relationship.
It’s not being fake, it’s not being untruthful, it’s just letting the prying person see a side of your relationship that they can deal with without interjecting their beliefs.
If they are always seeing love and happiness then there will be no reason to get involved.
Squash nosy people using the above 3 tips. Your relationship will thank you!
Bellaisa gives out relationship advice for men on all things relationships, including how to be a happy couple .
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